Writing and delivering a eulogy can be emotional and difficult.
A eulogy is a way to honour and pay tribute to someone who has died by giving a short speech. It is used to remind people about the life, character, and impact they made on those around them.
So, when it’s for your mother, it can bring on a whole host of emotions. No matter the relationship you had with her, it probably won’t be easy to say goodbye.
Here we will go through some basics on writing a eulogy for your mother and some suggestions on how to deliver it.
The building blocks 🧱
Before you start writing, it’s good to organize everything that you would like to say. This includes choosing stories, memories, and knowing how long you have to share. Usually, sharing a eulogy will be between 3-5 minutes.
Some details you can include are:
- Her date and place of birth
- Names and relationships of people she was close to
- How she met their partner
- Where she worked and who she worked with
- Hobbies or interests
- Her work in the community
Clubs and societies she was a member of
A few questions to begin molding your eulogy around.
- What were her values?
- What memories did she leave you with?
- How did she overcome adversity?
Was her family important?
You should also decide what tone to deliver the eulogy in. If they were full of life and outgoing, then the eulogy can be upbeat and perhaps even humorous. Don’t be afraid to tell a joke if that’s what your mum would have liked. If you had a difficult relationship or she passed away in challenging circumstances, then it can be more somber.
Find memorable stories 📖
It’s important to remember that a eulogy isn’t a biography. Instead of just listing all of their life events, you want to find a few stories that reflect the type of person they were.
These stories can be kind, humorous, or simply remind people of her special personality. Asking family and friends for stories can be a good way to get started and remember her life together. You may also find some inspiration from notes and tributes that have been shared online.
What did her life teach you? 👩🏫
One of the most important parts of a funeral is to remember their legacy. How did she shape the person you have become and how do you want her to be remembered? It’s good to remember how her life connected with yours or how her morals shaped yours. Perhaps how her difficult life made her determined to do better for you. You want the eulogy to explain why she was important, not only her achievements.
Start writing (the details) ✍🏽
If you’re struggling to find the perfect words and are getting worried, don't. This is meant to honour your mum and come from the heart, you can’t and won't mess it up.
You should start by introducing yourself and how you’re related to her. Following this, it’s customary to thank those who have attended. You can then talk about the details of her life listed earlier and the type of person she was. Next would be the personal stories, linking them to what she meant to you or why it’s such a special memory.
Near the end, you can add something personal such as a song lyric, a poem, or religious text. You can always simply just say goodbye and tell her how much you love her.
Delivering the eulogy 🎤
To ensure delivering the eulogy is as uncomplicated as possible, you will want to edit and practice it. Having someone else take a look at it could also help. It’s possible that you will get emotional while delivering the eulogy, so practicing beforehand will help you gain confidence. Having a friend or family member as a backup to support or help deliver the speech is not a terrible idea either, you don’t know how you will respond in this situation.
Remember, that at a funeral, people will be more sympathetic and understanding. If you speak from the heart, you can’t go wrong. If funerals have you thinking about the future and perhaps even death, that’s good. You can never be too prepared. Let us help you tackle uncertainty with life insurance and wills.